Touch (September 27)

I have a love hate relationship with Pop music. But as much as I try not to like everything the Neptunes do I can’t help it (well almost everything I can’t get with some of those non-rapping dudes they produce.) Chad Hugo and Pharrell Williams make, as Jay-z says, “beautiful music.”

I was first introduced to the Neptunes, who make beats like one of the best, N-E-P, T-U-N, E-S through Nore on his “Super thug” “what, what, what, what, what, what, what.” The Neptunes have made me like Justin Timberlake “Senorita”, “Rock your Body” (that’s the song he was singing when he pulled Janet’s bra off.) No Doubt “Hella Good” and even Brandy’s brother Ray Jay awe “wait a minute” all artists I wouldn’t have listened to with out their musical production.

They have a song out now that they did for Omarion. I know I know… how can I actually invoke the name of B2K in my blog? But I like the beat. And it wasn’t until yesterday while I was on the Neptunes’ site that I realized that they produced it. I really started liking it back when I was watching “So you think you can dance” another reality show that I kind of lost track of when the big black dude got voted off. Didn't he kind of remind you of John Gray? The song is called “Touch.” Now I don’t even know the words to the song, afraid to look them up cause I might stop liking the song.

It’s funny, how I come up with this stuff.

So today’s blog is about touch.

So I wrote the paper for class. Revealed a lot of stuff about myself to myself (and my professor.) Well one of the things that came out in a discussion with my classmate was the need for touch. We can go hours, days, weeks and months without a touch. But we need it so much.

The power of touch affirms our being. It helps us to know that we are still alive. When someone touches you they engage you. It makes you feel that you are wanted and appreciated. Even a hit is a touch. We can interact with people on a daily basis and not touch them. I really believe that some have children to have something to touch and to touch them back. So many people do so many things, just so they can be touched. When’s the last time someone touched you. I don’t mean in it a sensual way, well at least not necessarily, but can you remember the last time? Not by accident, but someone intentionally touched you?

There is nothing like someone putting their hand on your shoulder, or supporting a love one on their back, rubbing the arm, caressing the face. How many people go so long with out it? I remember as a little kid before bed I would give my Mom a hug and a kiss every night. I don’t remember when I stopped, but I think I can tell you how. We probably went to bed mad one night and one night stretched in to two or three and as a little kid I probably learned how to withhold my expressions of affection. We more than likely got used to not doing it. It is so easy. It’s safer that way.

We were walking up to our rooms today and one of my classmates made a joke of giving me her cold or whatever she has, and she grabbed my shoulders from behind as if she was giving me her throat condition right then. When another classmate and I discussed it I told him it felt good, he said he could tell by my reaction. But it wasn’t something sensual. That lead into a discussion about touching and affection and the lack thereof that we both experienced in childhood. And how that can lead you to make up for it in adult life.

Working with kids I am keenly aware of that. I give out so many hugs it’s ridiculous. And even with adults. I hug and when I talk I brush a shoulder and when I shake a hand I will hold it a little longer. Yeah it gets me in trouble some times, but we need to be touched and it’s worth the trouble.

I could easily go into that Dionne Warwick song right about now, but that would be too easy. But see if it makes a difference this week. Be careful though.

(*Reality show update. A black family won’t win The Amazing Race this year. They lost on the season premiere. Their name was actually the Black family. It might be an even tougher year for minorities on reality shows when we loose on that show, all we got left is America’s next top model. BTW, who got voted off on the first week of The Apprentice? (come on you knew I was watching) The latina, but she deserved everybit of her firing*)