Banned from TV (August 25, 2005)

I’m going to try to make this good; I’m leaving early for orientation this weekend.

Any way. A couple of days a go a friend of mind who knows me quite well sent me an e-mail. It was a article focusing on a new service that basically acts as a casting agency for potential reality T.V. contestants. Now if you know me you would understand why my friend Key would send this to me.

I am an absolute reality T.V. Junkie.

It’s kind of like that Popeye’s commercial with Bruce, Bruce. “I like everything about Popeyes, I like the spicy chicken, I like the shrimp, I like the reds beans and rice, I like the French fries, … I like the napkins, the salt and pepper…. etc. What a Coon. (I am sorry. Actually I’m not.)

Well I’m sort of like that. I like the real world, I like America’s next top model, I like are you the girl, I like blind date, I like survivor, I like American idol, I like so you think you can dance, I like being Bobby Brown, I like the apprentice. I mean I’m an old school reality fan. I watched the first reality show ever, when Mary Ellis Bynum put together the true story, of seven strangers, picked to live in a house and have their lives taped. Way back in 1992.

But see the thing is I shot back to Key in the spirit of Whitney, ‘Hell-to-the-nah... have you seen what they do to minorities on reality TV?’ Just like I had earlier to my boy cereb when he suggested I go on the bachelor to find my wife.

And thus in a nutshell is my love hate relationship with reality TV. I love to watch it, hate to see what they do to minorities on it. Not even mentioning what we do to our selves, need I mention “Being Bobby Brown?” I know you’re saying, you might be taking this too far, it’s not that bad out there. But idn’t? (My new word for isn’t)

Well the thing is since the second season of the real world reality TV has been the forum for displaying minority treatment in America. Remember David on the real world season 2? Remember how he was playing around with the shows only other black person Tami and tried to take her cover off of her while she was on the bed in her pantys? IF you didn’t see it that’s what happened and it seemed as lighthearted fun at first until Tami realized, “aw shucks, the cameras are on and I’m in my draws under this cover.” Except David didn’t realize that she had turned serious. So what was a joke between everyone in the house turned into a campaign to remove David from the house because he made his housemates feel unsafe? First of all, why is there only one or two at the most black people on reality shows in the first place, with those odds you can’t win. Then they always seem to gang up on them and have them voted off or removed for some stereo typically “ethnic behavior.” Don’t believe me? Give me an example and I can show how they made it happen.

· David from the real world – Black brute. Come on he was pulling sheets off of the bed.) *Side note- Tami was conveniently used as a Black Female lynching agent, Which we’d see again. *

· Kwame from the apprentice – Uncle Tom. He was so laid back that he made it to the last two on the show, but was taking out by another Black Female lynching agent, set up by Donald Trump.

· Omerosa – Jezebel. She was the quintessential “angry black female” on the apprentice that made everybody seemingly have a bad day. She says editing made her look that way. My thought, Trump paid her. Then she was mysteriously brought back to be in the final team to uh… ‘help’ Kwame win. Why’d I say help Kwame? Cause he had the second pick. Kwame 2, 4, 6. Bill 1, 3, 5… Who was going to end of with Omerosa? By the way that was Kwame’s reason for losing picking Omerosa first. Shame on him for trying to stick together.

· Kevin from the second season of the apprentice – another Tom. He was so laid back and non-confrontational and he made it to the top three and was fired so quickly on the second to last show that if you blinked you would’ve missed it. What was he told he was being fired for? Being over qualified. WTF?

Now I’m not calling them these things actually, I’m just saying their onscreen persona fit right into the racial caricatures that we are always portrayed as in the media. Like when I say Uncle Tom, I mean the Non-threatening Negro.
View the Jim Crow caricature website for more info.

The apprentice by the way seems to be one of the biggest offenders. And might I add they’re coming back with two versions. The Donald trump version and the Martha Stewart one. Can you hear Martha “Out on bail / fresh outta jail / California dreamin / Soon as I stepped on the scene / reality shows screamin” God bless the dead. R.I.P. Tupac.

Speaking of Pac… I’m not defending or excusing all of the rappers that have cut albums since they went to or while still in Jail. But Why isn’t Martha Stewart seeing any of the Backlash that Tupac, Shyne, Beanie Sigel, C-Murder, Pimp –C did for doing business while behind bars?


I can’t think of any more examples, Besides Stacie J. But If I kept going I’d be going on forever. I just wanted to get that off of my chest. Watching all eyes on Kanye West now. I’m winding down. But Brothers don’t do so well on Reality TV. My other thing is. Have you ever seen a brother on reality get some love? Maybe that one time on real world Las Vegas, but home girl was kind of suspect that he hooked up with. She was in like a thong contest and went at home boy real early. I’ll tell you how about earliness in relationships at a later date, hint, it’s not good. But check the latest completed real world season in Philly. When I watched the first episode I was excited, they had a foxy sister on their and a brother who seemed to be really educated and well spoken, and (heavy throat swallow) he looked alright (insert diatribe from “boomerang” it’s not like I wanted to get with him… ooh look at his shoulders) So I’m thinking I’m going to see some black reality love, a first on TV. Heck, we don’t see Black people in love in the movies. But no. I’ll keep it short; the brother was on the down low. They didn’t even know he was gay till he told them. Then to top it off, the sister, had a white boyfriend, and hooked up with the White dude on the show. Major disappointment.

Now I know this is short of evidence and that I’d be hard pressed to build a case on these alone. But I dare you to give me more than a few examples where black people have found success on reality TV? Besides amazing race, and the model show, you’ll be hard pressed. Well, what’s funny is my dad can’t stand em. But I can’t get enough of em. Love to watch em, hate to see what they do to the brothers. So, No. I will not be on the latest edition of the Bachelor, Big Brother although I’d be better suited for celebrity fit club or America’s biggest loser.

Well anyway, I’m going to wrap this up. I gotta go and watch “Being Bobby Brown.”
”It’s just me y’all!”

9:33 PM 8/25/2005